First of all, when I'm innocently scrolling through Instagram and see a private message, I expect to see a message from a lovely blogger not your ugly little Cyclops staring at me through my phone. It makes me feel dirty, like I've done something wrong to deserve being sent that. I'd put up a selfie a minute before and I thought, shit, did I ask for that? But you know what, whatever pictures you decide to put up, even if it's constantly ones of your dog with the occasional 'what I ate for lunch' post, there's always going to be some big bellend who will slide a pic of his little friend in to your DM's.
I have some questions. Why? Do girls do this to guys too? Did you just take that or do you have pre-prepared pictures? Is it always that small or was it cold or something? And what do you expect to happen? I'm being deadly serious with that last one. Do you expect girls to be like 'Oooh yeah, you seem like a nice, respectable man I want to take home to meet my parents'. I promise you, there is not one woman out there who will appreciate seeing a strangers penis right off the bat. Not one.
And the thing I find funniest is that there's no conversation first. It's like they go in with their trump card first - 'Flop out a picture of the knob, that should do it'. What I find ironic is that the general opinion from guys (not that I agree with this outdated view) is that women should be coy and act like a 'lady', yet they also expect a dirty reply or even a picture sent to a guy they have never met/spoken to/knew existed before that moment. They would probably then brand them too easy and search for Mrs Right instead, but that's none of my business.
This particular guy styled out my lack of response with a classy 'Sorry, this wasn't meant for you'. Oh smooth cover up, my friend. Because you don't follow me, we've never spoken before, so to message me, you would've had to search me and click to send me a DM. The only accident was putting that thing where it wasn't wanted. Also, final tip; if you're going to send a dick pic, even after reading this, don't be stupid enough to send it to a blogger/youtuber/writer/entertainer etc. Because we will go right ahead and use that for material. Completely anonymously of course, so that you don't have to experience the same embarrassment as I did explaining to mum why I had a picture on my phone of a penis. Especially since I'm single. You're welcome.
What are your thoughts on penis pics? Am I wrong or right?